Something Must Be Wrong With Me

No one hears me, understands me
I speak in silence
hoping that someone will see my words, my message
hoping to find love, it has arrived so divine
I wish for a stronger, better life
filled with everlasting touch
I dream the future, but hold the past
My body is brimmed with so many confusions
Am I really here experiencing fullness?
I must be, the pain is so real
the hurt I feel could never be imagined
but I will pull through into greatness
and destroy whatever faces into me
As I struggle I will fight until the end
Whenever it may come
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Something must be wrong with me
with all this hurt inside,
always bursting with anger,
and never any pride.
Something must be wrong with me
if all I do is cry,
I can't stop this pain
all I want to do is die.
Something must be wrong with me
if my emotions run wild,
all this confusion does
is make me feel like a lost child.
Something must be wrong with me
with all these terrible things,
always there and never gone
depression is what it brings.
Something must be wrong with me
if I can't stop these thoughts,
all this pain does
is turn my stomach in knots.
Something is truly wrong with me
when I think there's only one way out,
"Let this pain end,"
is all my heart will shout.

The End
Play with razors
Play with knives
Cut yourself
And live your life
Cut it deep
Hit the vien
Let it bleed,
Bleed,and bleed
So cold inside
So hard to live
Cut again
You've hit again
Hit the floor
Bleed to death
Die right there
Thats the rest
You've gone too far
Your so depressed
You die to live
Yet lived to die
You dont regret
The things you did
You hurt inside
And did what you did!!!

Let Go

looking in a broken mirror
the revealing of what had been kept inside
was finally clear
a wanting of something
that could end it all
to reap me of my
shattered soul
all the things
my mother did
came rushing back
a plague of insanity
was all that remained
one by one
as they slid down
my throat
consuming everything i was
drowning me in my thoughts
of the meaningless life i held
as the blade seeped
into my skin
a rush of relief
filled my entire body
tears flowing from
my swollen eyes
blood gushing
from my wrist
she pleaded for me to stop
but her pleas went unheard
no matter what she did
nothing could stop me
I had no reason to live
And with that
I let go
Laying in her arms
My thoughts consumed me again
I wanted to live
But I knew it was too late
A yawn escaped my trembling lips
As the hour went by
I felt my body begin to shut down
Piece by piece
I was dying
Frightened cries were all that was heard
As she watched me take my final breathe
And finally let go

A Dip Into Despair
a dip into despair
as i struggle
and pull my hair
I cant control my thoughts
and my stomach is in knots
taking a day at a time
i'm paranoid by the crime
my car breaks down
im new in town
no dough
no one to trust
that i know
headaches are common
as the light blinds me
my glasses fog up so i cant see
nothing good comes my way
so I can have fun and play
now I see myself grow
wide and round really slow
the girl that was there
seems like she doesnt care

when you were there
i wished you were gone
cuz i was annoyed
and never thought i cared
but you stopped calling
and I soon forgot
but something was missing
i wasn't paying attention
you left knowing i wouln't know
and over the years
you had started to grow
instead of together
now we were both far apart
never knew you left a scar on my heart
searching for you over the years
i couldn't believe not finding you
had become part of my fears
it's too late cuz now that i know you are there
you found someone else to love
i didn't realize life was so tough

Suicide
Suicide....Suicide....Suicide
This is what my thoughts are
Suicide....Suicide....Suicide
I do not have a star
To put in all my hopes
To put in all my dreams
Where will I be without my star.
Before you came
Suicide....Suicide....Suicide
These were my thoughts
But now I am lost.
I do not have these thoughts anymore.
Live....Love....Laugh
That is whats running through my mind.
Live....Love....Laugh
I must be insane
Running off cocaine.
Live....Love....Laugh
These thoughts are brought to mind.
Live....Love....Laugh
It must be some kind of sign.
To be here with you
And the love that you sew.
I quit the drugs
But brought on the pain.
But it is bearable
As long as I have you to gain.
Suicide....Suicide....Suicide
Nope, dont need these thoughts no more.
Live....Love....Laugh
Now I have something to live for

poems from me , and my friends

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when you are cought in the storm
call upon the lord and he will save you